What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 02.07.2025 09:36
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
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Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Make Nazis afraid again!
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Has anyone ever really waited that long and gotten a paper check mailed 20 days ago?
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
TEXT:
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
How would you feel if your girlfriend had dick pics on her phone?
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
What do people with very high IQs do all day?
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.